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fcuked up.
Friday, March 31, 2006
There's just so much anger in my heart.the other day,work ended half an hour early.so since we(IQ, M, N and i) were hungry,we dropped by LJS at cine for dinner.only me,N and M ate.IQ did not as he had no money.i offered him some food but he rejected.So we were eating and talking away.then suddenly IQ and I ended up in a quarrel.i don't know how on earth it ignited.so we started quarrelling and quarrelling.then he said(in malay), "kau fail kan?kau dapat 29 kan?kau cakap ngan aku mana poly nak kau?" which means "you fail right?you got 29 points right?you tell me which poly wants you?".i stared in silence.i was dumbfounded!how dare he said that!i was hurt.really hurt.M and N just looked at me.then N said(in malay), "eh.kuranghajar nye bebual" which means "eh.how rude to say that".he replied(in malay), "tak la.aku Cuma tanye je mane poly nak dia" which means "no la.i was just asking which poly wants her".
I was already lost in my own world.how could he say that?he had no right to say that.oklah.he does have a right to say that since it's his mouth,but what he said was a decision made w/o thinking twice!which is just plain selfish.i just kept silence.i didn’t know what to say.my mind went blank......
Walk with him to the bus-stop.we talked like normal.like as if nothing had happened.we even laughed together!dammit.in the bus,I reflected on what he said earlier.i should have thrown the tartar sauce and the coke drink at him for saying that.i was really mad.i called J and NN.sms-ed Q.she said to leave him alone.
Well.i'm still weeping in silence.dots.