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the girl next door


Nurain(:
Imma good girl. I'm short, fat & I bite. I love cats. I rot at home all day.

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Aeisha | Hafriz | Hazwan | Wanto |

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I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

shout-outs
Saturday, January 20, 2007
attended an event called "NE Symposium Confrence" in school today. it's so BORING!
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my blog today will be all about shout-outs to various people... if your name's not inside, don't be offended as this is only meant for certain people. (:

- To S****a:
I'm still confused over what you told me. it was a seriously BIG news for me. yes, i believe its for my own good, but i still can't get over the fact that it happened. how can someone so innocent ever do that....? i'm not traumatized but just in a dilemma.

- To Ariffin:
Why are you leaving so soon? if i knew earlier, i would have grab hold of every opportunity that i had with you. you mean so much to me. i wish to see you again but how am i suppose to do that when i don't see you in school anymore? please... i wish to see you..

- To Idza:
It's not that i don't want to be friends with you. its me, not him or you. please. i don't want you to give up his love for him. love is a feeling that connects two souls together. so please, carry on the feeling. it's just that, whenever i see you with him, i feel so reluctant to actually be with you. its easy to say, "join in la" but when the feeling's not right, the situation will be so awkward. it's difficult for you to understand how i actually feel. sigh.

- To Ash:
i........................................................ really don't know what to say to you. lets begin by me, asking "who am i to you? a friend or a foe?" let me tell you why our situation's like this. you wanna know how i feel? i feel like i've been so foolish and stupid to actually realise that you were unworthy of my friendship. i can't believe we were so close back then to the extend, people have this mindset that you have feelings for me. but now, i actually realise that, you have been using me to your own advantage to satisfy your heart desire. i was like a bridge between you and her. everything you wanna say to her, everything i said to her and vice-versa, must be in a full report to you. but whn you got close to her, you simply ignore me like as if i was spreading a plague. am i someone whom u can toy my feelings around? am i? i can't believe you still had the cheek to ask me along with her for a movie, with a condition, i can't interrupt whenever you're conversing with her. so what's with the purpose of my presence? to be a lampost?what kind of a close friend are you actually? you don't give me miss calls anymore. you don't answer my calls. you don't reply my messages. you reject my phone calls. you don't talk to me in school. you don't apologize when you do something wrong, no, wait, you DON'T even know when to apologize. you made me look like an idiot to wait for you for almost two hours and when you show up, there wasn't even an apology heard from you. i had to say to you that i wanted an apology from you before you could extend one. you made me call you at 4am as you can't go to sleep and got bored. you told me to f*** off when i said i'm f***ing off from your life. all i'm asking for is for us to be friends like we used to be. i'm not asking for the world from you. but i guess, that's something taht i won't get back right? oh well.

last words: thank you for everthing that you have done to make my life misreable. THANK YOU SO MUCH.....


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