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Imma good girl. I'm short, fat & I bite. I love cats. I rot at home all day.

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I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

It's been a while
Saturday, March 20, 2010

It's been a while since I pen down my thoughts in here. Tonight, I feel like blogging. Mojo just kicked in I guess.

Life has been having it's emotional turbulence every now and then. You have it when you least expect it. Love, desire, despair, elation; everything that you can ever imagine, I've felt it this season (okay maybe not all). Despite it all, I alhamdulillah, I manage to not succumb to other my needs, wants and desires. 

It's the school holidays, but yet I've already started on my FYP project. Hopefully everything goes well. I want to get an A, but they always say, aim for the sky. Even if you fall, the very least, you'll land on the stars. (: 3rd year's just around the corner, but I'm guessing I may need to retake my Year 2 modules. It'd be a blessing if I don't have to. Maybe if I compensate in Yr 2, I'd actually need not repeat? Fat hope. Oh well. I'll pray for the best. I needa put in my all this 3rd year. Like, finally, I can find a stable job after graduation, insya Allah. (:

Currently, I'm still working at Vivo. Well, working there has been one heck of a ride. There was a major reshufflement and Hirman was to resign as of immediate effect. A man of great leadership skills have left Vivo. True, his working styles may be similar to those of military school, but after he left, all of us realized that we prefer his style; his scoldings, his way of discipling us kids, it has been instilled in us and it fits our daily lives perfectly. Ever since the new management took over, I'm comfortable with a manager and a supervisor, but I still have yet to adapt to the way the new boss works. But honestly, after the new management took over, many of my colleagues left and the only ones that are left plans to resign by June (which includes me, of course). Well, maybe I will, maybe I won't. At the moment, I'm still letting nature takes it's course. It's not easy to leave a company that I've been working for, for almost 3 years now. It really is not easy. Maybe I'll stick around till I graduate and find a stable job for myself. Only time will tell. (:

I'm falling in love. Correction. I am in love. I am in love with the man that I've known for a year coming this end April. I want him more than a friend. I want us to move on from that "friend" state. But I don't know what his motives are. I don't know what his plans are. Nope, it's not that I'm desperate. But I just wanna know, where do I stand in his heart. He avoids this form of questions whenever I ask him till I have developed a fear in me in asking him this love related questions. Sigh. If only I could muster enough courage to ask him the next time we meet...

It's already March. How fast time flies. Soon, school will resume session again. Oh well.

"Our Lord, lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear."

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